Dart Publishing

Dart Publishing, Ltd. is the official name of the business I’ve been trying to get started with my friend for a while now. We’ve made huge leaps recently, thanks in part to having some extra time due to the Crispy Gamer implosion. I’m very nearly done with the first draft of the business plan, and will be sending it out to a few folks I know with way more business experience than I have, in order to get their feedback on it. From there, it’ll be revisions, and then probably applying for some local grants. Investor money is good, but free money is even better. Might as well look for that first, right?

Writing

Last month I finished not one, but two novels — my NaNoWriMo projects from 2007 and 2009, “The Broken God Machine” and “Morgan Skylark and the Monster Hunters,” respectively. If anyone out there wants to read the first draft of The Broken God Machine, it’s ready for criticism. Just get in touch. I still need to make some tweaks to Monster Hunters before I open it up for critique from the outside world, but that should be happening soon. I’m also making some progress on the second draft of the sequel to The Blood That Bonds, currently titled “Blood Hunt.” I expect work on that to speed up significantly once I’m no longer spending my coffee shop time filling out competitive analysis forms and burn-rate spreadsheets for Dart. Speaking of TBTB …

The Blood That Bonds

I haven’t had too many responses in my agent search, and so far the responses I’ve had haven’t been positive. I’m not particularly discouraged — people are still reading the eBook and sending very positive feedback — but I’m beginning to wonder if I should revise the first chapter a little to make it a bit more attention-grabbing right from the start. There’s a little too much opening exposition and I think it’s turning agents off. We’ll see.

Photography

Unfortunately, the broken 18-55mm lens that I fixed with superglue for a while has broken again, so we’re stuck only using a distance lens on our camera, which is a pain in the ass, so we’re not taking many pics at the moment. I need to get off my ass and either re-fix the lens using a better piece of plastic (and more superglue), or just cough up the ~$140 it costs to buy a new one. Why does everything have to be so damn expensive these days? Blargh! Rotten kids … GET OFF MY LAWN!

Cocktails

I went on a bit of a beer kick the past few months, trying lots of craft beers and really strengthening my understanding and appreciation of the different types available (turns out I am way more of an ale guy than a lager guy, with a particular fondness for brown ales, porters, and stouts). I’m coming out of that now though and getting back to crafting new cocktails. I’m still experimenting right now, but when I come up with something good, I’ll post it here.

Video Games

I went out and picked up BioShock 2 the other night at my wife’s urging (one of many reasons why I married her!) and have been playing through it. I’ll post a full review here when I’m finished, but I’m pretty far in and while I’m enjoying it, I’m kind of disappointed in how much more they’ve chosen to focus on combat. You’re constantly being swarmed with enemies, and while I’m not dying a lot, it’s just not a whole lot of fun to be in non-stop firefights. After BioShock 2, I’ll be picking up Mass Effect 2, and Assassin’s Creed 2 … apparently it’s all about the sequels right now.

Reading

Sadly, given how many activities I have going on, I haven’t done much reading since Christmas, when I burned through Bill Simmons’s Book of Basketball in a week or so. I’ve got three novels and a short story collection all waiting for my attention, not to mention a non-fiction book on real estate investing that I really should finish

French

Mon francais n’est pas superb … but it’s getting better. I do a half an hour of studying per day almost every weekday, and Charlotte and I are beginning to try to speak to each other more in French. We’ve also found some French cultural events to go to around town, and I’m about to start in on French grammar in addition to speaking/listening. It’s still a halting, frustrating process — I don’t like being bad at things — but all these little steps should hopefully add up to me being able to hold something of a coherent conversation with her friends and family back in the homeland, sometime within the next couple of years. Hopefully!

Travel

Speaking of the homeland, Charlotte and I will be making another France trip in May. Her sister is getting married in the south of France, which gives us the opportunity to fly into Barcelona in Spain, and spent the next week driving to Toulouse (actually, the nearby town of Albi), where we’ll attend the wedding, hang out for another day or two, and then I’ll fly back while she goes to Paris to take her finals for the French Lit program she’s working on. We’ve also got a trip to Florida happening in March, to visit my parents and sister, and a trip to Syracuse happening … sometime. Then as summer rolls into fall, we’ve got a wedding in New York City and a wedding in New Hampshire (I think) to attend. Yeesh!

… So that’s what’s up with me, in case anyone was wondering!

In, I think, 1993 I graduated to a black and white Stratocaster clone by the seemingly defunct company Regal Guitars, which cost me $210. That thing had sticky tuners, couldn’t hold a low E to save its life, and sounded like pig anus unless you ran it through multiple effects pedals. Nonetheless, I rocked out for many years on it, using my DOD 3RTR pedal (which I still have!) to get big-hair 80s metal tones when what I really wanted was some Billy Corgan-esque, fat layers of bass-heavy Les Paul distortion. D’oh.

In, 1997 or 1998 I bought a Fender DG20CE acoustic-electric for about three hundred bucks, which has since moved with me from Syracuse, to SoCal, back to Syracuse, to Philadelphia, to New York, and finally to Indianapolis. It’s got nice tone (though the pickup kind of sucks), and after I brought it to a “guitar doctor” the action’s not bad, but it’s not exactly a fine instrument. Amusing side note: my dad brought my old, $139 guitar to a “doctor” a few years later, and it now plays better than the Fender. Dude lowered the action by like six inches.

Finally, in 2004 I managed to get my hands on an Epiphone Elitist Les Paul Standard Plus in heritage cherry sunburst, for about $750 from eBay. While not a true Gibson Les Paul, the Elitist line (discontinued in 2009) was way above the standards of the rest of the Epiphone offerings. The guitar is beautiful. It sounds beautiful, plays beautiful, and looks beautiful. I love it and have no regrets whatsoever about not springing the extra couple hundred bucks to get an inferior Les Paul with “Gibson” on the headstock, or the extra grand it would’ve cost to get a Gibson that was actually superior. I also came in second in an online poker tournament and converted the prize money into a POD XT multi-effects unit that complements the Les Paul wonderfully.

I run all of my (electric) guitars through a vintage, late-70s Fender Bassman 10 tube amp that my uncle gave to me back when I was in high-school. It’s got great tone, helps me get the deep bass I like in my guitars, and looks pretty swank to boot!

All that said, I find that moving on up in the guitar world has, rather than satisfying my cravings, only increased my interest in acquiring all kinds of different guitars. So, for the hell of it, here are the ones I’ve got my eye on as “near-future” (hopefully next five years) purchases:

Taylor 414ce Acoustic-Electric

When it comes to high-level acoustic guitars, you’re either a Martin man, or a Taylor man. Martin makes some beautiful, highly playable instruments, and have been doing so since approximately the dawn of time. They make their guitars using traditional methods, and the results are outstanding. Taylor has taken a different approach, using the latest industrial methodologies — laser guidance systems, computer-controlled sonic imaging, etc. I respect both brands and would be happy as hell to have one of either, but I love the thin body, grand-auditorium shape and clean sound of the Taylor *14ce series. The 414ce is a bit more within my expected budget (about $1900), otherwise I’d be all over the 914ce, which is a goddamn work of art.

Fender American Standard Stratocaster

I went through a period where I was all “The Les Paul is the be-all and end-all of electric guitars and there’s no point in owning anything else.” I’ve since softened that stance significantly, though I do still feel that if you sent me to a desert island and told me I could only take one electric guitar on earth, it’d be a Gibson Les Paul Standard from their custom shop (probably the ‘59 or ‘60 VOS). However, there’s something to be said for the versatility and tone of the Fender Strat, and the American Standard is, at $1150, the model I’ve got my eye on. I like the Sienna Sunburst with Maple Fretboard option, myself.

G&L Tribute L-2000 Bass

Sooner or later, you gotta buy a bass. While I don’t expect to ever be a virtuoso at it, I still want to be able to lay down my own bass tracks when recording music, so this is my choice. Why? Well, it’s expensive enough to not be cheapshit (about $600), and it’s cheap enough that I won’t feel like I’m throwing away money on things I can’t appreciate. Also, it passed the all important “Charlotte flipping at random through the pages of Musician’s Friend and going ‘I want that one!’” test. She digs the blue one, and I am pretty fond of it as well. Second choice would probably be Walnut Satin.

In late 2009 Crispy Gamer acquired GamerDNA.com, 360Voice.com, TweetMyGaming.com, and an associated ad network running ads on multiple privately-owned gaming websites. The board of directors, excited by the massive increase in page views and ad sales opportunities, decided that it was time to cut costs on the Crispy Gamer front, consolidate down to one company, and focus mainly on revenue. They laid off Crispy Gamer’s entire editorial staff, including the managing editor, the copy-editor, the senior writer, and several contract writers. They alerted the other freelancers that there would be no further work coming in. They also told the development team, consisting of myself, my friend Gabe, and our Junior Engineer Stanley, that our services would only be needed for a few more weeks as they transitioned Crispy Gamer to a more basic website.

To that end, Gabe and I were still technically employed by Crispy for a few more weeks, working on some back-end changes to the site. It felt a little creepy, like dressing up a friend for his own funeral, but this is a part of the internet startup world: sometimes things don’t go as expected and the board, who let’s not forget invested $8mm in this company, jumps in and assumes control in order to try and recoup their initial investment.

For my own part, I find the timing unfortunate. Beginning with the redesign in May 2009 and moving forward into the summer and fall of 2009, I thought the site had really turned the corner. It was much easier to use, much easier to navigate, and much easier to read than the previous design had been. We’d developed some really cool technology using current AJAX and DHTML techniques, and were looking forward to building even more. Our user community was taking off, with nearly every article getting several comments, and some of them getting dozens. Our numbers were holding steady despite dramatically decreasing the amount of paid traffic … in short: people were using the site, liking it, and coming back without having to be enticed by marketing or ads.

That’s exactly what you want, when you build a website. Unfortunately, that tipping point came too late. Instead of happening at about six months in, it took about eighteen, because there was a lot of stumbling in the first year. This, also, is not exactly uncommon in the world of startups, and I don’t blame the Crispy founders or employees for it — sometimes it takes time to find your voice and establish who you are. It’s just sad, because I’ve been on the other side of things. I started working for GameSpy in 1999, just as it was making its move from “three guys in an office running a couple volunteer sites” to “investment-backed real company with multiple product types”. It was touch-and-go during that time and a single different — not even necessarily bad — decision could’ve submarined the entire company. Instead, we struggled through, figured things out, and became profitable. It’s a great feeling and an amazing thing to have gone through, and I’m sorry that many of my fellow Crispy staffers don’t get to find out what it’s like.

I worked with a lot of good, smart, talented people at Crispy and I’m happy to have spent the last two-plus years there. We may not have made it over the hump, but we came damn close, and I’m proud of what we accomplished with the site. Now it’s time to move on to the next adventure. Gabe and I have both accepted some work with a San Francisco-based startup, for one thing. For another, I’m 35 pages and counting into a business plan for our own internet startup, which we’re hoping will allow us to raise some grant money and be able to employ ourselves full-time. It’s a very busy, very interesting time, but I’m excited about the possibilities out there and looking forward to continuing to learn and improve as a web designer and development director.

Oh, and now that I’m done with CG, you can expect more frequent updates to this blog, too. Woohoo!

Chrismas Day Lunch: Two geese, sausage and giblet stuffing, squash, salad, god knows how many baguettes, two plates of cheese (none of it recycled from the previous night), a gigantic “log” made from choux and carmelized sugar, chocolate, coffee, red wine, white wine … and a few things I’m forgetting!

Vive la france, and may god have mercy on my waist-line!

“Bonjour Chris, comment ca va?”

“Uh, la fille a un chapeau noir dans sa main droite?”

“… Vous etez un bouffon.”

Anyway, after the annual gift-fest of your religious or non-denominational choosing is over, you get another few days of anticipation for New Years, which is usually an enjoyable night, unless you’re one of those crazy people who goes and stands in freezing cold Times Square for six to ten hours in a pool of your own bodily fluids (no, seriously – there are no bathrooms available out there to non-police/military persons). If that’s the case, then you have my sympathy, not so much because your night will suck, as because you’re clearly out of your mind. I’ll be someplace warm, drinking champagne and watching the festivities on TV … because I’m sane.

Once that’s over with, you hit January second, and that’s when the realization sets in for everyone who lives north of South Carolina: there is now nothing but arctic wasteland between you and mid-april. It’s going to snow, then it’s going to get “warm” (about thirty-eight degrees) and then the snow will become gross sludge, and then it will freeze solid, and then the cycle will repeat. This will go on until everyone is wishing only for the sweet embrace of death, on the off chance they’re going to hell, which at least will be warm. Then we’ll get two months of rain before things are nice.

Remind me again why it is that I don’t live in St. Martin?

Anyway, the point of this post was to say that I hope everyone has an excellent holiday season and new years, and that I sincerely hope your winter is as short and warm as it can be.

Oh, and these items are listed from most recent to least recent. For example, the first two albums are from 2009, and the last album is from 2000.

Swoon – Silversun Pickups

With their third release, Silversun Pickups continue to realize their considerable potential, moving further away from “that band that sounds like the Smashing Pumpkins” and into their own style. Definitely the most ambitious and complex of their albums so far, Swoon shows improvements across the board, from individual instrument mastery, to the quality of the lyrics, to the intricacy of the songs. Just a fine album on all levels.

Hazards of Love – Decemberists

Pretentious? Absolutely. Whiny? Yeah … I can see that. Nonetheless, Hazards of Love is a terrific album made by a group who understand their instruments and how they work together, and graced with not one but two amazing guest-singers. Hazards of Love tells a complete story in an interesting, catchy fashion. The final song on the album is arguably the strongest, wrapping everything up in a bittersweet bow.

Black Holes and Revelations – Muse

The best Muse album so far, as the band continues to deviate further and further away from their Radiohead and Nirvana roots, exploring new styles of music. Standouts “Map of the Problematique,” “Exo-Politics,” and “Knights of Cydonia” (aka: “Laser Horses!”), are my favorites, but the album’s littered with highly listenable tracks.

10,000 Days – Tool

Some have criticized 10,000 days as being a bit less heavy than previous Tool albums, and I will agree that there are a few songs that sound more like A Perfect Circle than traditional Tool. Nonetheless, Tool’s fourth full album contains plenty of pounding drums and syncopated guitar work. Even if I didn’t like the rest of the album (which I do), I’d have to include it on this list for “Jambi, “The Pot,” and “Rosetta Stoned” alone … the latter of which is eleven solid minutes of fantastic, deranged raving.

Nude – VAST

VAST has yet to disappoint me with an album, but I think Nude is his best work so far in that it’s the most complete, featuring more real songs and less filler than the two that came before it. His acoustic album, April is also high up on the list, but didn’t quite make the top ten because I’m too much a fan of harder rock. Nude has all the VAST hallmarks which I really enjoy, including great guitar work and absolutely impeccable taste in drum loops.

Demon Days – Gorillaz

When they set out to make a sequel to 2000’s unexpectedly popular, self-titled album, I kind of expected Gorillaz to fail. Dan The Automator projects don’t usually get sequels, since they’re mostly about capturing lightning in a bottle, and since Nakamura wasn’t even involved with this one, I wasn’t expecting much. As it turns out, Demon Days is superior to the original album in pretty much every way. It features fantastic engineering from Danger Mouse, superior lyrics from Damon Albarn and a stable of guest-rappers, fewer throwaway tracks, and an awesome sense of gloom and despair which lends a real depth to the album. If I had to pick a best album of the entire decade, it’d either be this one or Hazards of Love.

The Pleasure and the Greed – Big Wreck

This band apparently imploded due to Ian Thornley’s ego, which is a shame, because The Pleasure and the Greed was definitely one of the best “just give me some good old rock and roll” albums of the decade. With the exception of a mediocre first track, everything else on the album is catchy and enjoyable. I particularly enjoy “Undersold,” “Breakthrough” and “Head in the Girl.” Also, I bet “Ease My Mind” is one of the most fun songs ever to play live.

Music to Make Love to Your Old Lady By – Lovage

Take one part Mike Patton (the most versatile male vocalist in Rock and Roll), add one part Jennifer Charles (quite possibly the sexiest female vocalist in Rock and Roll), and one part Dan the Automator. Shake them all up with a bottle of spanish fly and you’ve got Lovage. Music to Make Love to Your Old Lady By is a slinky, smoldering set of trip-hoppy songs, all of them about the many and varied joys of sex. While I wish Patton wasn’t relegated so much to a background role, it allows Charles to absolutely steal the show. Great, great album.

Lateralus – Tool

Lateralus suffers from the same problem that every other Tool album does: half of the tracks are filler, made up of weird noises, chanting, and other oddities. On the other hand, the tracks which are actual songs are almost universally fantastic. There’s plenty of classic, heavy Tool on display in songs like “The Grudge” and “Ticks & Leeches,” but my two favorite tracks — “Parabola” and “Lateralis” — are both heavy and melodic, continuing the Tool tradition of marrying metal with progressive rock. If you combined the best songs from Lateralus with the best songs from 10,000 Days, you’d have quite possibly the best album of the decade.

Mer De Noms – A Perfect Circle

This band was originally formed by a guy who was a guitar tech for bands like The Smashing Pumpkins, and you can hear that big-rock sound in some of the songs. Maynard does more singing and less growling here than he does on Tool albums. The result is melodic, complex, and well-written. Though it features few radio-friendly songs, the album as a whole is a definite cut above the average modern rock offering of its era.

Honorable Mentions

April – VAST
V is For Vagina – Puscifer
The Garden – Zero 7
Absolution – Muse
Busted Stuff – Dave Matthews Band
Gorillaz – Gorillaz
R – Queens of the Stone Age

I think the results speak for themselves!

Big props to my lovely wife for talking me into the costumes (including awesome fake “mother” tattoo). She’s the best!

Dart Publishing

The personal business project that I moved here to work on is coming along — I’m working on a business plan, which is just about my least favorite thing in the world to do, but I think it’s a good exercise for me. Not only does it force me to think about the long-term goals of the company, but it also forces me to power through something I don’t love doing … which I’ll probably have to do a lot of if we ever get the company off the ground.

The Blood That Bonds eBook

Coming along! A lot of the art is finalized, and I’m beginning a project to also turn it into an audio book (read by yours truly). Just bought a really nice USB microphone for that exact purpose. I’m hoping to launch the site in mid-September. Here’s a sample pic to whet your appetite a bit!

The Fatass Project

Not coming along as rapidly as I’d like, but it is coming along. Down to 208, from a start of 213.5. Last couple of weeks have seen consistent loss tho, so it seems like I’ve reached a point where I’m paying enough attention to what I’m eating. Now to see if I can motivate myself to accelerate that with a gym membership.

Project Asimov

Oh, I don’t know … do you think this counts as “outrageous” yet?

The sideburns are long enough that I can now twist them into three spikes (on each side) using hair goop … tho I haven’t actually left the house looking like that. Maybe if I still have them at Halloween.

On a highly related note, I don’t mind the sideburns at all but I utterly despise the long hair. I cannot wait to shave 90% of it off at the end of September. Might keep the chops tho.

On a semi-related note, be prepared for pictures from the New York State Fair’s demolition derby, coming after labor day weekend. I’m going to dress up like a hick, drink cheap beer, and watch cars crash into each other. Should be ridiculous and awesome.

All that said, I currently have three albums that I’m basically listening to, one after another, over and over, which is probably driving my lovely wife insane. Here’s a list. I linked the album names to amazon.com mp3 downloads, but it should be noted that I don’t really care where you buy them from since I don’t have any affiliate programs or any of that crap set up. :)

Swoon by Silversun Pickups

I have to admit, I first heard of these guys through a Bill Simmons chat on ESPN, but I really enjoyed their EP and their first album. They’ve matured very well, and Swoon is definitely the best thing they’ve put out so far. Just about every song is great, and their music is growing more complex in its musical and rhythmic structure. If you forced me to choose between these three albums, and never listen to the other two again, I would probably choose this one … even though I don’t think it’s the best of the three. Just happens to be my favorite in terms of style and sound. These guys are still a pretty young band, but they’re really coming into their own. I’m excited to wear this album into the ground, and I hope to catch them on tour (I saw them after Carnavas came out, and it was a pretty fun show).

Burn Burn by Our Lady Peace

These guys just haven’t been the same since their original guitarist left. Since then they’ve gravitated more and more toward safe, mainstream rock, sacrificing a lot of the quirkiness that I really enjoyed about the band. Their last album, Healthy in Paranoid Times, was terrible. It has exactly three songs that are worth listening to, and exactly one song that has any business being on a “Best Of” compilation. Thankfully, Burn Burn is something of a return to form. I think it’s probably their best album so far with the new guitarist.

The lyrics aren’t going to blow you away with their poetry or anything, but the songs are catchy and only a little pretentious (I like a little pretension in my music!). I’ve listened to the entire album several times through and have yet to find any songs that I don’t like. That’s a good sign, especially since it normally takes me more than a dozen listens to really open up to an album. I’ve seen this band live more than any other band – mostly due to circumstance and not because I was trying to – but this is the first time in a couple of albums where I’m actually looking forward to seeing them again.

Hazards of Love by The Decemberists

We caught these guys on Colbert, and my wife was intrigued enough to add them to her playlist. I thought they were very talented, but not necessarily my style, and wasn’t totally sold on the album until we saw them live a few weeks ago. I went along to the show mostly because Charlotte loves live music and enjoys having me there with her, and was blown away.

I’m not a huge live music person, but I’ve been to plenty of shows, and I’m serious when I say this was one of the top three shows I’ve ever been to (amusingly, Our Lady Peace also has a show on that list). They rocked the hell out of it, playing their entire new album straight through without a stop, transitioning between the songs on the fly, then taking a short intermission, then coming back on and playing a whole second set. They were personable when talking and totally tight and in synch when playing. I’ve since gone back to the album and found a lot to like in it. If I had to recommend one of these three albums to someone without knowing their tastes, this is the one I’d choose.

Oh, and Shara Worden, a guest vocalist on the album from the band My Brightest Diamond, has an absolutely amazing set of pipes. She reminds me of Grace Slick from Jefferson Airplane — that kind of intensity where she could be singing about her breakfast and you’re like “holy shit, this is the most important thing on earth.” The other guest singer, Becky Stark, is pretty damn good too. Both of them were at the live show, and the band’s cover of  “Crazy on You” by Heart was an awesome showcase of their talents. If you can catch these guys while they’re on tour, do it!

Cool

• Broad Ripple is an awesome neighborhood with lots of quality restaurants and bars within an easy walk.
• We love our house, even tho the air conditioner occasionally pours water all over the basement floor.
• We bought a 2001 Saturn L300 (that’s a car, for the record) for a reasonable price. It’s comfy and fun to drive.
• Charlotte managed to pass her written driving test – to get her learner’s permit – without knowing she had to take one and thus not studying for it at all!
• My friend Gabe and I have begun working on our business stuff again.
• We can play Rock Band without a crazy German dude who lives below us banging on our floor / his ceiling.
• We’ve met a bunch of cool people through various friends.
• The local gym is a fraction of the monthly cost of New York gyms.

Not So Cool

• This move was very, very expensive.
• On a related note, our old landlord is taking their sweet time sending us back the TWO MONTHS deposit that we put in.
• The car we bought immediately developed some engine problems and had to go in for service.
• The mosquitos out here are voracious.
• No one who is hiring market researchers in Indianapolis seems to believe in moving faster than a glacier.
• Poison ivy really likes growing in our front garden.
• It’s apparently been the rainiest summer in history, or something.
• We managed to break our 18mm-50mm lens (ie: the main lens) for our digital camera, so we’re stuck using the 50mm-200mm lens until we get a replacement, which has been hard since, as mentioned, the move was very expensive. This means taking pictures of anything other than distance stuff is kind of a pain in the ass.

The overall judgement: we like it here. A lot. Especially now that we bought some bug spray.

Whether that will remain the case through the winter … we’ll have to wait and see. :)

Project Updates

Project Asimov: PRETTY OUTRAGEOUS! New photos coming soon.

The Fatass Project: Still sitting at exactly 213.5 pounds. THAT DOG WON’T FLY. Every time I lose a couple, we have a get together on the weekend or something where I drink a bunch of beer, eat a cheeseburger and ice cream, and sit around watching tv/movies! Time to hit the gym.

Thanks to Valerie Everett for the photo!